Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
