So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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