There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
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i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
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I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
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