I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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