Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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