I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I need moral support for this bender
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
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