White coat. Heels.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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