he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
