that's an acceptable place to lick
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
