everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
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