if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Randomize
