matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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