I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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