and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Randomize
