it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
