I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
