Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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