I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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