Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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