I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
