Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
