Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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