Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
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