Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize