Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
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I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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