Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize