There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
