You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Randomize
