Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
