So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Randomize
