ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
