i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
