Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Randomize