She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had me at "let me see your balls"
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize