around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize