what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
