My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
