im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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