i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
