I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
They are going to name an STD after you.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
