Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
