dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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