I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
