her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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