Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize