Did you just see the Batmobile???
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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