I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I have feelings that need drinking.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
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