you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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