you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
