But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Randomize
