I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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